This was floating around the Statehouse yesterday.
draft
HOUSE RESOLUTION ___________
Sponsored by Representative ________________________
WHEREAS, This House of Representatives has learned with great sadness, but absolutely no surprise, that this high priest of Gonzo Journalism, Dr. Hunter Stockton Thompson, clicked “30†with his very special personal digital assistant for the last time this weekend, and
WHEREAS, what the F—-, right now Hunter S. would have blurted out “Dude, I croaked myself to see if I could push the untimely demise of Sandra Dee off the lead story perch of Entertainment Tonight, and
WHEREAS, had cable t.v. and talk radio been in vogue in the ‘70’s, a coked up Rush would still be pitching underhand in Kansas City and O’Reilly would be picking some “no spin zone†out of his a.., while T.H.E. Doctor was dazzling likes of Tom Wolfe, Norman Mailer with his feisty .no Bulls…. Style, and
WHEREAS, if there had ever been a Hunter S. Thompson fear and loathing roadshow to the statehouse media’s government subsidized work crew, the PAR intern posse, would have been told to ditch those bureau chief gnomes and head for the sun, and
WHEREAS, had the tour coincided with the full lunar eclipse and a gubernatorial drop-in; the mind conjures visions of the Doctor descending the grand staircase, Wild Turkey in hand, to eyeball Governor Elvis’–laden media stunts and a head snapping, â€Hey A—hole. I knew Elvis. Plowed down some Reds and Jack with Elvis. You, Sir Gumby, are no Elvis,” and
WHEREAS much like the day the music died; the of end Dean Gonzo’s tenure came at a troubling time in the nation’s history — ensnarled in Bush War Machine machination, death from the meds designed to save us and who knows what toxic poisons the biz world whizzes at us — now therefore be it
RESOLVED that these words be quietly passed from desk to desk on the floor of the Illinois House with a blank roll and those with balls marking “yes†and those caught in the ugly mucked filled world that is the far right staying mute. And be if further
RESOLVED that a copy of this document be smuggled to the family of Doctor Hunter S. Thompson with a fond recollection that his work made many laugh, cry, rant and rail about the human condition to a level not likely to be seen in a long, f— ing time.
Mahalo
I take no responsibility for the content of that draft. Just found it funny.
By the way, click that pic to buy a limited edition print.