|
Caption contest!
Friday, Sep 24, 2010 - Posted by Rich Miller * Let’s start the day off with some fun…  As with a couple of weeks ago, the winner gets one hour of cocktails (or soft drinks) with yours truly. That last night out with the winner went so well and I had so much fun that I figured I’d do it again. Have at it.
|
- Thoughts... - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:07 am:
“Hello, Governor”
“Hello, Governor”
- bored now - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:08 am:
“I can’t wait ’til you find all the little surprises I’ve left for you!”
- Anonymous - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:10 am:
You know, I really need to keep this job. How am I gonna earn a living?
Always good to see another career politician.
Hey look! A Kitty!
- Montrose - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:10 am:
An unidentified man braces himself for the earth to open and the heavens to fall at any moment as the final sign of the apocalypse plays out before him.
- Deep South - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:12 am:
“Pull my finger. No you pull MY finger. No you pull MY finger. No you pull MY finger………..
- flabergasted - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:14 am:
Next the coin toss…heads you win tails I lose.
- Montrose - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:15 am:
And Dosey Doe!
- zatoichi - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:16 am:
Quinn starts the thumb wrestling match with full on contact with a classic fore finger lock while Brady counters with a slippery ‘Mandel thumb off’ technique.
- Montrose - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:16 am:
Just keep grinning…you can do this…just few more seconds..
- Cincinnatus - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:18 am:
Paper ties Paper.
PQ: Everything I know about anything is in this folder.
BB: Pat, your hands are sweaty.
On three, One, Two, Three, BREAK.
One minute later, Brady checks to see if he still has five fingers.
The setting is as non-descript as the candidates.
If a governor governs in the wilderness, does anybody hear, Pat?
- Rich Miller - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:20 am:
Bill Brady and Pat Quinn attempt to win the world’s record for number of yards between two men shaking hands.
- vole - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:20 am:
“Taxes to you, sir!”
“Axes to you, sir!”
In a handshake lies the whole. In an election lies the half.
- Montrose - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:20 am:
Come on everybody, line up. It’s limbo time!
- dave - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:21 am:
Pat Quinn: “So that’s what Bill Brady looks like. I never looked at the back row of the Senate.”
Bill Brady: “Look… a long-time state worker. Lets lay him off. Or pay him minimum wage. Or, at least, pay him minimum wage after we lower it.”
- Oswego Willy - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:22 am:
“AP - State Senator Bill Brady reluctanly accepts a handshake from Governor Pat Quinn but refuses to squeeze the governor’s hand. Brady saw Quinn leave the bathroom and Brady did not hear the bathroom sink used”
- Anonymous - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:22 am:
Quinn: (Whispering over his shoulder, to aide): “Do you have the Purell?”
- Ron Burgundy - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:22 am:
When Governor Quinn told his staffers he needed to “trip up” Bill Brady, this wasn’t what he had in mind.
- Erwin - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:25 am:
Arms length, as agreed gentlmen. Now, LET’S GET IT ON!
- Oswego Willy - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:27 am:
Quinn (to himself), “What soft hands Bill has … I bet he wears racing gloves when driving that Porsche…”
- OT - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:28 am:
Brady: Nice folder. Is that your new “Betsy?”
Quinn: Sort of. I call this one “Screw job.”
Brady: Mmmm, ok.
Quinn: AFSCME gave me their endorsement, but wanted you to have this.
- ANON - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:29 am:
“Gentleman, it’s agreed then that the winner will be determined by a strongest handshake competition. I’ll be watching closely for any cheating, so no biting, scratching, spitti….no, Mr. Whitney, you can’t play, so stay back there”
- Pot calling kettle - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:29 am:
The awkward moment ended when Rich Whitney showed up and brought the two men together in a group hug.
- We Todd Did - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:30 am:
Brady Quinn graduated Notre Dame with dual degrees in Political Science and Finance. Think anyone would notice if we pulled a switch? I’d rather see these two back up Kyle Orton.
- He Makes Ryan Look Like a Saint - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:30 am:
Quinn thinking: “You won’t be smiling when we take the “B”s off all the keyboards in the Governors office!”
- How Ironic - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:31 am:
Brady “See, I can even take 10% off my handshake…I’m not even using my thumb!”
Quinn “That’s 20% dufus”
- WRMNpolitics - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:33 am:
Brady & Quinn (simultaneously to aides)-”Quick, get me the disinfectant wipes”
- lakeview - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:35 am:
Now, go to your corners and come out fighting!
- Anonymous - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:36 am:
You can tell a lot by a handshake.
Quinn has the power grip going on, with his index finger reaching up to Brady’s wrist, preparing for a firm shake. While Brady is rocking the passive, all-fingers-together polite extension, expecting no shake, just the gentle squeeze of a stranger.
- dave - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:37 am:
Bill Brady: “You carry your own folder? I have assistants to assistants to assistants that do that. That is what happens when you are a millionaire. Of course, the assistants are non-union, poorly paid, and miserable. And I laid off most of them. But I’m still a millionaire!”
- tikkunolam - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:37 am:
In an historic turn of events, mortal enemies shake hands without Bill Clinton grinning in the background.
- Blue Dog - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:37 am:
“1,2,3,4 I declare a thumb war.”
Winner inherits billions of dollars in debt.
- Clint - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:44 am:
Bill Brady: You have to ask yourself one question: ‘Do I feel lucky?’ Well, do ya punk?
- Stones - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:47 am:
Shake hands….turn around and walk 10 paces….and come out firing!
- anon sequitor - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:48 am:
Brady and Quinn congratulate each other for saying nothing of substance during campaign nor taking any hard issue stands. Meanwhile an aide demonstrates to the media the preferred campaign stance for straddling the fence.
- gadfly - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:48 am:
that’s it!!! i’m done with eharmony FOREVER. 29 Dimensions® of Compatibility for lasting and fulfilling relationships my foot. and i bet everyone else in this folder is just as bad or worse.
- Boone Logan Square - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:50 am:
One night, Springfield holds a Brady-Quinn debate. Quinn is giving the opening speech:
My fellow citizens of Illinois. As a young boy, I dreamed of being a baseball, but tonight I say, we must move forward, not backward, upward not forward, and always twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom.
The crowd is cheering heartily, and Brady is about to take the stand, when Rich Miller comes bursting in.
Rich: Stop! Those candidates are phonies!
[crowd murmurs]
You heard me! They’re alien replicons from beyond the moon!
[crowd laughs at him]
Rich tries to prevent secret agents from throwing him out by using a laptop as defense, but to no avail. “Don’t forget your stinking laptop” says one, before throwing it at him.
Dejected, Rich takes a walk by the shore of Lake Springfield.
In frustration, he kicks a bush, only to hit metal. Removing the bush, he discovers the aliens’ spaceship — clearly visible anyway. Inside, he removes the liquid from the tubes, re-animating the real candidates.
Quinn: Oh, no, am I still here? I don’t wanna serve out my term naked
in a tube…
Brady: I am so mad at the Illinois State Police right now.
Rich takes the ship in space, flying towards the Capitol.
Quinn: You know, Senator, being in suspended animation gave me time to
think. Partisan politics are tearing our state apart.
Brady: You got a point there, Pat. If you and I are gonna whup these
one-eyed space fellas, we’re gonna have to set aside our
differences.
Quinn: Together, we can lead Illinois into a new Golden Age.
Brady: Friend, you got a deal.
Brady asks Rich to get them out of those tubes, but Rich somehow
manages to press the wrong button, and sends them both flying into
space.
Rich: Oh, no. What have I done? What am I doing? What will I do?
In panic, Rich smashes the control panel, and sends the saucer
crashing towards Springfield.
Meanwhile, outside the Capitol, the candidates are giving their last
electoral speech.
Kang: The politics of failure have failed. We need to make them work
again. Tomorrow, when you are sealed in the voting cubicle, vote
for me, Senator Ka… Bill Brady.
[applause]
Kodos: I am looking forward to an orderly election tomorrow, which will
eliminate the need for a violent blood bath.
[applause]
From the sky comes a scream, as Rich is crashing right into the
Capitol. A few footsteps later, he comes running down the stairs.
Rich: Illinois, take a good look at your beloved candidates. They’re
nothing but hideous space reptiles. [unmasks them]
[audience gasps in terror]
Kodos: It’s true, we are aliens. But what are you going to do about
it? It’s a two-party system; you have to vote for one of us.
[murmurs]
Man1: He’s right, this is a two-party system.
Man2: Well, I believe I’ll vote for a third-party candidate.
Kang: Go ahead, throw your vote away.
[Kang and Kodos laugh out loud]
[Rich Whitney smashes his “Whitney 10″ hat]
- A.B. - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:51 am:
**from the aide in the background**
“For the millions of Illinoisians watching around the state, LET’S GET READY TO RUUUMMMMBBBBLLLLEEE!”
(royalties to Michael Buffer will be paid through new stimulus funds from the federal government)
- anon sequitor - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:51 am:
Or, Brady and Quinn agree on balanced budget while campaign aide demonstrates balancing maneuver.
- OneMan - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:52 am:
Governor Quinn made the biggest mistake of the campaign when he failed to keep is gun hand free.
or
If sharing all this stuff in this binder doesn’t show everyone why I should be governor, I don’t know what will.
or
Only the man in between Quinn and Brady understood what a Buffalo Stance really looked like
or
The two leading candidates to be captains of the Titanic met today.
- Clint - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:53 am:
Bill Brady: “You stop telling lies about me and I’ll stop telling the truth about you. “
- Oswego Willy - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:54 am:
Brady, “I was expecting Dan Hynes.”
Quinn, “That’s funny, I was expecting Kirk Dillard.”
Brady, “Funny how things work out, isn’t it?”
Quinn, “Yeah … funny…”
- OneMan - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:55 am:
Governor Quinn was glad he brought his big binder of September press releases so he could share them
or
Bill Brady: Hey Pat, you know you don’t need that big file folder to run the AFSCME fantasy football pool, you can use a computer now..
Quinn: Really?
- Chi - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:55 am:
“Careful what you wish for buddy. If you could read the stuff in this folder, building more subdivisions in cornfields might start to look pretty nice…”
- Oswego Willy - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:57 am:
Brady, “Leave the Transition Folder, Take the Cannoli, Governor …”
- Mistro - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:58 am:
As a staffer takes up position as a living wicket, Governor hopefuls Bill Brady (who made sure the hand buzzer was square in Quinn’s palm) and Pat Quinn (carrying his laser-printed copy of “Governing and Lawn Sports for Dummies”) exchange wishes of good luck before their first campaign contest: Human Croquet.
- OneMan - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 9:59 am:
Both Quinn and Brady got Put your right hand in correct where the guy in the back though that the splits are part of the hokey pokey
- Montrose - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:04 am:
Oh, enough with these formalities. Come here and give papa a hug.
- VanillaMan - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:05 am:
“You have to wind up a joy buzzer for them to work Billy.”
“Thwy also don’t work on handshakes that limp Pat.”
- caneck - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:05 am:
Brady: Did you practice being an egghead or were you born with with the accordion folio?
Quinn: Yeah, well, your aide has a wide stance.
- Lets Dance - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:06 am:
You put your right hand in and you shake it all about.
These two are hooky Jokies and could not turn our state around.
That’s what this election is all about!
- Oswego Willy - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:09 am:
“UPI - Governor Pat Quinn tests State Senator Bill Brady on their secret fraternity handshake, after Brady forgot the secret password.”
- KeepSmiling - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:09 am:
Brady: Maybe we should just fist bump next time.
Quinn: I, uh, really don’t know how to do that.
Brady: Maybe that’s part of your problem, Pat.
Quinn: How about an air kiss, Mr. Downstate?
Brady: Which union are going to ask to bend over, Pat?
- Greg B. - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:10 am:
Nixon and Khrushchev were warmer towards one another…
And how can two men be more awkward than Tricky Dick?
- VanillaMan - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:12 am:
“Where’s your banjo Shiela?”
“Next to your driver’s permit Jason.”
- Pat Robertson - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:13 am:
(both think to themselves): “Hey, why isn’t this guy passing me an envelope?”
TII
- Montrose - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:15 am:
Governor Quinn shakes hands with the newly unveiled Bradytron 2000.
- Stormin Normin - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:24 am:
We’re f_cked.
- siriusly - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:25 am:
As they exchanged greetings Governor Pat Quinn gives Sen. Brady a gift, the keys to the Governor’s office.
- VanillaMan - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:25 am:
“By Grabthar’s hammer, by the suns of Warvan, you shall be avenged!”
- BCross - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:25 am:
“Hi Larry. Where’s Moe?”
- Oswego Willy - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:26 am:
Brady, “No Pat, You can leave a files of resumes for me to look at until the cows come home, I doubt I will keep any of your staff on … sorry.”
- Cincinnatus - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:26 am:
Choreographer Louis van Amstel teaches the difficult Pasodoble to Illinois gubernatorial candidates Bill Brady and Pat Quinn for their upcoming appearance on Dancing with the Stars.
- Oswego Willy - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:27 am:
Quinn, “Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.”
- siriusly - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:28 am:
PQ “good luck working with Madigan”
BB “oh we’ll be fine, we are already working together to help Lisa win in ‘14″
- Skeeter - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:28 am:
The only way to balance the budget and cut taxes is if you cut government so much that it all fits in this little file.
- Timber, Ho! - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:28 am:
PQ: What is that?
BB: The pass-grip of a Master Mason.
PQ: Has it a name?
BB: It has.
PQ: Will you give it to me?
BB: I did not so receive it; neither will I so impart it.
- RobRoy - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:34 am:
“Liar, tax cheat”
“Bungler, sell out”
- Oswego Willy - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:35 am:
Quinn, “Do me a favor Bill … I know you want to hide Plummer and give him ‘busy work’ but enough with the coloring worksheets! Look at this folder … please… enough!”
- sal-says - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:38 am:
“Don’t get too close, you might be contagious.”
- Bakersfield - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:41 am:
“Hey, I voted for you.”
“Hey, I voted for you too!”
- wordslinger - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:45 am:
In a surprise development at their first debate, Sen. Brady and Gov. Quinn forego questions and agree to settle matters with a “Lindy” contest, as Larry “Wide Stance” Craig Jr. looks on.
- Oswego Willy - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:46 am:
Quinn, “What’s in the file folder? My petitions for Mayor of Chicago …”
- Newsclown - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:47 am:
“Re-creating the famous knife-fight sequence of the Michael Jackson “Beat It” video proved tougher than expected for the dancers involved.”
- Bakersfield - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:48 am:
“Is that a pink shirt?”
“It’s salmon”
“Sure it is Governor, Sure it is”
- Oswego Willy - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:50 am:
Quinn, “To make it easier for you Bill, I put the ‘90 Days + Pass Due’ bills in the front section of the folder, and then the ‘60 Days past due’ in the next section, and so on … “
- Who Cares - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:52 am:
PQ-”Who is this guy?”
- Really?? - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:56 am:
If we work together, we can fulfill this man’s life long dream of participating in a bi-partisan limbo contest.
- 47th Ward - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 10:57 am:
Brady laughs and yells “psych!” as he yanks his hand back at the last minute.
- Ed - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 11:11 am:
Gentlemen, lock your right hands and start swinging with your left. Below the belt shots encouraged. Winner inherits $13B in debt.
- dumb ol counrty boy - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 11:18 am:
Brady: Liar
Quinn: Over-achiever
Guy Standing in between: Senator I will not allow you any closer to the governor, sorry can do it. walk it off, don’t even look at him…beat it..
- Steveo - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 11:20 am:
Governor Pat Quinn tries to figure out if he’s taller than Bill Brady.
- Irisheyesrsmilin' - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 11:27 am:
Brady: Sorry your not getting the Chicago Public Schools Endorsement Pat.
Quinn: Sorry your not either Bill. Hey, how’s your puppy feelin’?
- dumb ol counrty boy - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 11:29 am:
Brady: Hey Pat what are you doing here?
Quinn: Bill, hey hummmm, I might as well tell you,I hold your tax files right here in this folder. I just got them from this IRS agent to my right, your left. We will be going public, I mean using it for campaigning purposes, maybe a commerical or something…
Guy to Right: Damn it Pat your were not suppose to tell this was suppose to be hush hush
Quinn: Bill, well its not this guy right here, I meant the other guy to your right not my right, he has walked on, yep he’s gone, just went around the corner… Good luck i’ll be seeing you.
- zatoichi - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 11:32 am:
Is that spit on his hand?
- Jbugg - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 11:35 am:
Each are thinking… “I SO wish my arm was longer….as in a 10 foot pole…”
- Drew - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 11:36 am:
Don’t cross the streams. Why? It would be bad.
- girllawyer - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 11:37 am:
Come on Boone Logan Square. If you are going to rip off “The Simpsons” you should at least acknowlege it somewhere.
- uh-oh - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 11:39 am:
Guy in the middle looking like he’s ready to do the splits: “Okay, Billy play nice…shake hands…easy…don’t show any agression or your teeth. 40 days to go and you’ve got this, breathe easily…”
Bill Brady’s new consult staff member talks to him at a recent event.
- Skeeter - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 11:40 am:
Wait, did you just say $13 BILLION? My staff told me $13 MILLION. Now, I can fix a $13 Million hole with tax cuts and some minor budget cuts, but $13 Billion? That’s just nuts. Nobody can do that. $13 Billion you need to raise taxes. You can’t do that without raising taxes. Where’s my staff? Fire them all. I’ve fired people before. And because of it I paid no income tax at all. Hey, guy behind me. Get my staff. Tell them they are fired. STAFF! STAFF! You are all fired. But before you go, somebody get my tax guy on the phone. Looks like another tax free year in the Brady household.
- vole - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 11:45 am:
Please tell me the feller there with the wide stance is a Republican.
- Pot calling kettle - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 11:45 am:
Brady (thinking): Does anyone notice he’s tickling my palm?!?
- Warped Thinker - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 11:47 am:
The guy in the middle is thinking….. ” okay as soon as they grasp hands….I am going Red Rover on them..”
- Quizzical - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 11:56 am:
So the deal is still on. I blow the election every which way I can, and you name the high speed train from Springfield to Chicago ‘the Quinn Express’.
- Piling on - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 11:56 am:
PQ: You know: you have lovely hands — do you moisturize?
BB: I’m sorry?
PQ: I swear by it. I try all sorts of lotions. I went through a fragrance-free period last year, but now I’m liking this new brand fortified with rose hip. My sister, you know, she uses the aloe vera with the sun screen built in…
BB: Uh-huh. You said you’d be willing to pay in cash?
PQ: I did. You know: they say cinnamon is wonderful for your pores. Read that on the internet. And that ideally you should be wearing gloves to bed, but I find that would interfere with my social agenda. Problem is: I get a reaction to camphor so I can’t use traditional remedies…
BB: If you could pay cash, I could probably drop the price a little. To, say, seventeen… (as PQ squeezes a little)… sixteen each.
PQ: (smiling) That would be lovely.
- wordslinger - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 12:04 pm:
Piling On, channeling Chicago’s own late, great Bernie Mac.
- OLD GUARD - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 12:19 pm:
Pat, you will never know the secret cowboy handshake.
- Nuance - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 12:20 pm:
Both of you spread your legs like I am doing and then kick!
- Louis G. Atsaves - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 12:23 pm:
Oh now! I can actually still reach him!
- Anon91 - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 12:38 pm:
Brady thinking: “Transition is going to be fun…”
OR
Brady: “Say hello to your staff for me.”
Quinn: “I will…. wait a minute…”
- Anon91 - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 12:40 pm:
Quinn: “Any way I could be Lieutenant Governor again, Bill?”
- Don't Worry, Be Happy - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 12:43 pm:
Quinn: “Governor-Elect, I left something for you in the executive desk. In the bottom drawer you will find three numbered envelopes. When you run into a crisis you can’t solve, open one of the envelopes.”
- Pot calling kettle - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 12:47 pm:
Brady (thinking): If I can’t let go of his hand until he stops talking, we’ll be here for hours!
- Soooo... - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 1:04 pm:
PQ: Please, dont’ hurt me. I know what you do to puppies.
Brady: Funny you should mention that, wanna visit the local gas chambers?
(side note, why doesn’t anyone bring the fact up that Brady wants to reverse the banning of gassing of dogs? I have seen the video, it is sick…Another Side note, the guy in the background looks like he is a dancer from chorus line and the lady to the left looks like a Sarah Palin wannabe)
- Mr. Ethics - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 1:31 pm:
Bookends - by Simon and Quinnfunkel
PQ “here are my tax returns, can your accountant go over them for me?”
- Improptu Fool - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 1:37 pm:
So that is what slime feels like!!!
- Cuban Pilot - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 1:43 pm:
BB: “Pat, from the bottom of my heart, I just wanted to come over here and thank you personally for being the worst statewide candidate ever and thus allowing this right-wing, puppy gassing, porsche driving, empty suit the opportunity to be governor.”
- Squideshi - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 1:45 pm:
“You know, hiring this guy to stand at the ready and keep Rich Whitney away must have been one of the best things we’ve ever done.”
- wordslinger - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 1:46 pm:
Lot of good ones, but Cuban Pilot is tops.
- Rich Miller - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 1:49 pm:
Yeah, I think that was Jerry. lol
- Always Smiling - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 1:50 pm:
Ok, when I say “go” the first man to pull the other man past my shoe in the game of tug of war becomes our next Governor … Ready, one, two …
- Small Town Liberal - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 1:54 pm:
PQ - Why does that guy keep spreading his legs wider and wider?
BB - Jerry told him to do everything humanly possible to stay between me and the media, he takes it pretty seriously.
- Skeptic - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 2:05 pm:
You know, if we take both our major budget balancing ideas and use em, we’re half way to solving the problem!
- Pat Robertson - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 2:05 pm:
Don’t Worry, Be Happy == Quinn: “Governor-Elect, I left something for you in the executive desk. In the bottom drawer you will find three numbered envelopes. When you run into a crisis you can’t solve, open one of the envelopes.”==
In the Illinois version of the joke, the first envelope says, “Have the feds arrest your predecessor.”
- mason - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 2:10 pm:
Bill- “Pat why are you so sweaty?”
Pat- “I was watching Cops!”
- CantFixStupid - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 2:15 pm:
“Two people apparently not smart enough to avoid wanting to make major decisions on serious issues greet one another after they successfully avoid making major decisions on serious issues.”
- The Mad Hatter - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 2:18 pm:
I said gimme five, not shake my hand, dummy.
- Oswego Willy - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 2:27 pm:
Brady and Quinn, (to themselves)”He is just to extreme for Illinois”
- Corduroy Bob - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 2:43 pm:
I have but one folder to give my country!
- Squideshi - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 3:13 pm:
“I want a clean fight boys. Now, shake hands and come out fighting.”
- chathamite - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 3:16 pm:
Unemployment in this photo is about to go up 50 percent
- Swing Vote - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 3:58 pm:
Bill Brady and Pat Quinn are conspiring to raise your income taxes by 33% in a November Surprise. They want to tax more, spend more and borrow more. Isn’t it time for clean break? A fresh face? That fresh face is Scott Lee Cohen. He will be an independent leader that will teach Springfield politicians a lesson. Scott Lee Cohen, a clean break for Illinois. I’m Scott Lee Cohen and I approved this ad because I love puppies.
- Barton Lorimor - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 3:58 pm:
Jerry is Superman.
Brady & Quinn are shaking hands.
This rabbit hole is freakin’ me out. I KNEW I should’ve taken the blue pill…
- Anonymous - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 4:10 pm:
The thick file is my oppo file on you. The thin one is for Plummer.
- Oswego Willy - Friday, Sep 24, 10 @ 4:28 pm:
By agreement of both campaigns; No puppies were eutheanized in the creation of this awkward campaign moment.
- Chicago Patrick - Wednesday, Sep 29, 10 @ 10:22 am:
CIVIC FEDERATION GUY: My lords now reach forth with two gracious hands;
Such chivalry demands my broadest stance.
QUINN: I take thy hand most soft, my brother Will; and may the best man keep the laurel still.
BRADY: Thy hand I’ll take, tho’ hist’ry tells that he
Who wins this crown anon in stir shall be.